Sources say the former president was spotted on a boat near the infamous island prison, where he allegedly attempted offer somebits to a massive reptile. Witnesses claim that Trump perhaps got a little overly familiar with the beast, resulting in some whispering. The {entiresituation was captured on video, and clips have quickly gone viral online.
- We don't know why Trump
- chose Alcatraz
- but some speculate that he wastrying to make a statement
Breaking News: The Donald and the Danger Lizards!
A shocking development is unfolding at Mar-a-Lago as we speak/right now/at this very moment. Sources report that former President The Donald has encountered a pack of super creepy lizards, said to be mutated by radiation/the result of government experiments/escaped from Area 51.
Local reporters claim to have seen the former leader battling with the creatures, click here wielding a silver spoon. The situation is still developing/unfolding/sketchy, and we await official statements from a bewildered Secret Service agent.
Stay tuned for more updates on this bizarre event!
The Donald's Wild Tour of Alcatraz
Get ready for a wild ride, folks! Trump is hitting the rock/island/prison like never before in a tour/experience/adventure they're calling the Gator Gauntlet. Sources say he's planning on showing off/lecturing about/taking control of the island, wearing a MAGA hat the whole time. He's even rumored to be build a wall around Alcatraz during his visit. This ain't your grandma's tour of Alcatraz, folks. Brace yourselves!
- Will Trump be able to handle the cold?/Will Alcatraz stand up to Trump?/Can anyone stop Trump?
- Stay tuned for updates on this crazy story!/Follow us for all the latest Trump news!/Don't miss out on this wild ride!
Alligator Alcatraz? You Betcha, Says Trump
Folks, lemme tell ya somethin'. The swamp down in Florida is gettin' out of hand. They got these giant lizards runnin' wild. And what do they do? Nothing! They just let 'em cruise around. But not me, I wouldn't stand for that. We gotta make an example of these reptiles. That's why I say we gotta build a special prison - Alcatraz for these pesky beasts, folks! That's what makes America great, takin' standin' up to danger.
- Drain the Swamp!
The Don's Wild Ride: Presidential GATOR Safari!
This ain't your typical campaign rally, folks. The President himself is hitting the swamps on a wild adventure. That's right, we're talking about Trumpbattling beastly reptiles. Sources say he's packing his a brand new baseball cap and planning on showing those gators who's boss. Will he emerge victorious? Only time will tell!
You Won't Believe This! Trump Goes Cage Diving With Gators
Folks, you are totally gonna believe this! The Donald himself, ex Prez Trump, has decided to take a wild journey. He's swapping his golf clubs for some serious grit and is going into a cage full of mean alligators! Word on the street that this whole thing was a publicity stunt.
What could ever go wrong?? Only time will show.